HTFU

It is officially time to get back into it. (For real this time!). Some things have happened this past week that have put a damper on my attitude towards training. Time to get over it!

Lack of overall motivation. It was hard to get motivated for several reasons last week. I am not running, I was on overnights, I was having trouble sleeping, I had like 6 hours of scheduled workouts, and I was bummed out. I skipped a few workouts. I got the OK from Mary to do so (sometimes you just have a bad week where you need to sleep) but I can't be doing that anymore. I felt really guilty taking days off during such an easy week. Solution? This week I enter "Base 1" of my training.. so my hours were upped from 6 to 9! I am going to focus on getting quality workouts in every day. Everything else that has been going on is getting moved to the back of my brain because it does not do any good to dwell on things that I cannot change. Regardless of how bad I am feeling, I need to HTFU and get my workouts done!

I am cutting out all alcohol products that contain liquor. It's not like I drink a lot, but I do NOT need to be doing shots of tequila during Ironman training. Girls night out was fun. Dressing up was fun. Drunken singing and dancing to Billy Idol was fun. The hangover the next day was not.

However, watching Chrissie Wellington completely DOMINATE at IM Arizona yesterday was ridiculous. There is just not another female pro in the same league as her. 1st female pro, 8th OVERALL pro, came in less than 30 minutes after the first male pro and almost 30 minutes before the next female pro. She broke the world record for fastest female Ironman (Ironman brand) time. Absolutely disgusting. Anytime I watch Chrissie, I feel the need to go exercise for 4 hours and not eat for the rest of the day in hopes that it will make me fast like her!

Also, I have been discovering the many dimensions of Coach Mary. So far she has been a coach, a friend, a pimp (haha), and a therapist life guru. It's really good to know that she doesn't expect me (or any of her athletes) to be a triathlon robot who isn't affected by things that happen in daily life. I can come to her with problems, whether it be an injury, being stressed, lack of sleep from overnights, or a combination of them and she takes it in stride and has a solution, and never freaks out.

She knows that I'm already worried about Coeur D'Alene even though it's 7 months away. I'm worried that I am not running yet. I'm worried because I am so incredibly out of shape right now. I never got this out of shape between 2009 and 2010. But I know she won't send me to an IM unprepared!

So I guess that's that! I have a 4 day weekend coming up! I get to go to my parents' house, play with the dog, watch cable TV, eat lots of good homecooked food, and relax for a few days!

I wish triathletes rode brooms

So, I might be the world's biggest Harry Potter fan. OK, maybe not quite. But I am a HUGE Harry Potter fan. I go to sleep every night under a giant blanket with Harry playing quidditch on it. I wake up every morning with a Deathly Hallows tattoo on my wrist. I have read all the books over, and over, and over again. I have been to 2 midnight IMAX movie showings and I went to the midnight release party at Barnes and Noble for the 7th book.

(I have never dressed up as a character. I know where to draw the line).

I would freaking SCHOOL anyone in Harry Potter book trivia.

I own the first 6 movies. Now while I am fond of all of them just because they are Harry Potter movies, some of them annoy me by leaving out giant plotlines, adding in things that didn't happen, or making changes to what did happen. While I understand that a movie cannot encompass everything in a book - some of the movies are better than others.

That being said. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I was phenomenal. It's been a while since I read the book (probably a year) but since I've probably read it 10 times already, I'm pretty familiar with it. :) The movie really nailed it! It was funny, scary (just ask Matt who was sitting next to me every time I leaped out of my seat in fright), emotional, and freaking spot-on with the book. Some minor things were left out.. but not much!

See, I am not all about bikes and running and whining about bikes and running!

I have other interests! Harry Potter! horses! and.. uh.. boys?

bad decisions, bad week

Hello, my name is Alexa, and I make bad decisions. For example. I ran for an hour on Sunday. Running for an hour totally messed up my hamstring that WAS getting better. Would I have done this if I was left to my own devices? No. But when someone asked me to run, I went. I am blaming no one but myself. I could have said "no I can't run because I am trying to fix this problem" OR "yes I can run but only for 20 mins." But I suppressed these thoughts and ran anyway, hoping the run wouldn't do any real harm. I rarely run with anyone else so I was excited for the opportunity to have company. Halfway through the run when my quads were burning, my hamstring felt tight, and my heart rate hit 181 (not kidding) I knew that I had made a stupid decision.

Stupid, stupid girl.

I have not been writing much as of late. Mainly because I am still not doing much, I am depressed that I am not running, and I'm worried that I am not going to get my running fitness back to where it needs to be for next year. I am also kind of emotional and while it helps me to write things down, the entirety of the internet does not need to read about my angst. I have a whole bunch of unpublished blog posts written that serve as a catharsis without letting too much of my personal life out on the internet.

I am entirely too sensitive. I wish I had the ability to let things roll off me without affecting me. Instead, I take everything personally, I CONSTANTLY over-analyze situations, and I get myself worked up - usually over nothing.

Working out is my outlet, however since that is not going so well at the moment, I need an outlet for my outlet.

Work has not been going well for me this week either. I am on a week of overnights, which I hate, but normally I can cope with them ok. This week is different. Monday and Tuesday I experienced what I can only describe as severe anxiety after waking up in the afternoon and thinking about having to go to work all night. Monday I dealt with it by crying, skipping my workout, and immediately going back to bed for 4 more hours before work. Yesterday I cried, forced myself to do my workout, watched Glee, and then went into work. Every day this week I have been nauseous and the smell of food disgusts me, which has led to barely eating anything. Because of this, I have dropped a few pounds. Now while I am thrilled at any weight loss, losing weight due to being so stressed out and nerve wracked that I can't physically eat is not my ideal way to do it. I will take sanity and a couple extra lbs of chub ANY DAY!

I shall probably regain all of that weight back on Friday as I binge eat candy in the movie theatre when I go see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I!!!

At least there is the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

lazy blog list

I think I am going to follow suit with what my friend Amelia did in her blog. Yes I am copying her, but I am really tired, forced to stay awake, and I can't think right now. Basically, she made lists of the highs and the lows of her week. I am pretty much doing the same except mine is more.. current/upcoming things. Let's face it, I am exhausted and being lazy. I don't even have the energy to type out any more complete sentences! I can't wait to go home and pass out. (I may have already napped sitting upright in my computer chair at work - that's definitely a first).

Things that are bumming me out:

• I am still on C-shift at work
• the daunting task of cleaning my apartment
• my cat might have a cavity which means she may have to have a tooth pulled
• I will not get to see Ultra Adam for a long time.. like a month!
• having no vacation time for the rest of the year
• I have a freakish amount of bills to pay this month
• I ran for too long on Sunday and now my hamstring and my quads hurt

Things that make me smile:

• the new Harry Potter movie comes out this week
• I am all caught up with episodes of Glee
• the thought of going to bed immediately when I get home
• I got to go to Chuck's on Sunday (my favorite bar from when I lived in Syracuse)
• I also got to see a Syracuse Orange basketball game!
• the weather is SO NICE for November
• it's almost that time of year ---- CHRISTMAS!

give me a "P"!

The word of the day is: priority.

I can thank Kim for this topic, as we have had numerous discussions about it lately.

Prioritizing is something that every person, ever, has to deal with. Regardless of whether you are an endurance athlete, a couch potato, single, married with kids, unemployed, or a CEO, guess what you have.. priorities! Even if you're 5 and the #1 thing on your list is finding some toy you lost - it still counts!

Obviously, lots of people share a lot of similar priorities - family/friends, career, money. But then these things can branch out in so many directions.. it is amazing to me that someone will stand in line for hours to buy the new Call of Duty, but that same person probably is amazed that I stood in line for over 6 hours to register for an Ironman. My dad prefers watching PSU football games. I think my brother's #1 priority is drinking as many PBRs as humanly possible. :)

It's pretty easy for me to determine what should become a priority in my life. Simply - if it's something that I love, if it's something that makes me happy, or if it's something that helps me attain either of the first two things (AKA my job) - that's all it takes.

My current priorities include: friends/family, triathlon, my cat and horse, my job, and "me" time. I think that last one is really, really important. There are a lot of people out there that try to cram too much crap into their day and neglect to take time for themselves. And how much of that stuff that they are doing is REALLY something that is important to them? I understand that people have obligations, but seriously, sometimes you just have to say no. You have to be your #1 obligation! Perhaps that is why I spend so much time in my apartment with my pants off?

Everything in life is dynamic. At one point, triathlon did not even exist in my lifestyle. Five years ago, school took precedence. Time spent riding my horse has been reduced. New people have entered my life. Shit changes. You have to be able to adapt to things coming into and leaving your life. People always tell me that they would never have the time to train for an Ironman. That is bullshit. The time is available. That's what 5 am is for. I don't get up at 5 am to train because I don't have to, but if it was necessary, I would. I will move my workouts around in order to visit my family or see friends. Because Ironman is important to me but so are the people in my life.

It's all about balance. But I'm probably preaching to the choir here.

If you want something, or it makes you happy, then make it happen. If not, then move on.

ice ice baby

I think there is something wrong with me.

Before 348957 people chime in and say "well, yeah" - let me explain.

I am always cold. From October - April I freeze 24/7. In the summer, it's more sporadic. I'm not saying that if it's 95 degrees out that I'm cold THEN, but the problem with summer is air conditioning. This is why I will not wear shorts. (Well, I also won't wear them because I think that shorts are trashy and gross - and by this I am not referring to athletic shorts, but like.. denim shorts). Because no matter HOW hot it is outside, within 5 minutes of stepping into some public place that is air conditioned, I am wishing for a winter coat. I deal with this by always bringing something warm with me (such as a sweater or hoodie) if I know I am going to the movies, to dinner, to a doctor's appointments, or basically anywhere that I am going to be in AC for longer than 30 mins.

This is pretty normal for a girl.

What is not normal is the degree of cold I have been this week. I have been cold in places that I am normally cold this time of year - such as in my car first thing before the heat comes on, or in Wegmans, however I have been freezing my ass off in really weird places.

I am not normally cold at the gym. When I am there, I am either lifting - which makes me sweat and therefore makes me hot, or swimming, and my gym likes to heat the pool to a temperature suitable for "water walkers" AKA it's like 85 degrees in there. Usually I am DYING while I swim laps. Not anymore! Now I shiver and wonder if it would be inappropriate to wear my wetsuit in the pool.

I AM typically cold in my apartment. It's drafty and I don't really have a good source of heat (I have 2 weird portable plug-in heaters - one in my living room and one in my bedroom). This is what I get for living in an attic. Anways, I freeze in my apartment all the time but usually I can combat it by blasting the living room heat and snuggling up under some blankets. Yesterday, it didn't matter what I did. I had the heat on, I had multiple layers of clothes on, I had 2 blankets on me AND my cat on my lap with my hands underneath her, and I was STILL F-ING COLD!

At work I have been cold all week. I wear a thick button-down sweater over a short-sleeved shirt every day at work. (Actually, I wear the SAME sweater every day - yes I know this is gross. I am gross. I do wash it.. weekly.) But this in addition to the lab coat I wear at work is usually enough to keep me warm. Not so much now. I had to switch out the short-sleeved polo shirt for a long sleeved shirt, and I am STILL COLD. The only ways that I have been able to temporarily warm up at work are to stand behind one of the instruments that blows hot air out of its vents (problem is, this only occurs when the instrument is being used which is maybe twice a week) or to run scalding hot water on my hands.

In fact, the only places that I have been able to stay warm are in bed, while riding the trainer, and in the shower.

What is going on? I'm not sick. I feel healthy. I'm finally sleeping again. It's not even winter yet!

I'm a girl.. I am genetically predisposed to retain fat. Isn't this fat supposed to insulate me?!?

random

Alright, so I don't really have anything to write about. I have completed 1 week of very minimal training. Whoop-di-do. But I am being pressured by a certain friend to blog. So here goes (apologies in advance for being lame).

My super-random list of things, in no particular order:

1) I don't think anything in the entire world pisses me off more than Americans and their bottled water. Things including: screaming babies, uber-religious zealots, people driving Hummers, any kind of conservative bumper sticker on a car, skinny hipster jeans on dudes. All of these things bother me less than bottled water. WATER IS FREE, PEOPLE!

2) I thought unicorns were real WELL past the age that it was appropriate for me to be believing that unicorns were real.

3) There is a guy at work named Gary Fisher. Every time I hear his name, I wonder if he owns a bicycle company.

4) I hate having to cram my cat into her cat carrier. Although I pick her up and snuggle her all the time, she seems to somehow KNOW when I pick her up with a non-cuddling motive (i.e. stuffing her in the travel box). She combats this by wriggling, meowing, spontaneously shedding massive amounts of fur, and clawing me. She has a vet appointment on Friday. I already know I am going to show up to that appointment covered in fur, probably bleeding, and feeling really guilty.

5) Another thing about my cat.. she is awesome. She sleeps with me, she snuggles me every day on the couch, when it is cold out she will lie on top of my hands to keep them warm! I love her! Best cat ever!

6) I ran today for 15 minutes. It was cold and dark out. I wore my Lululemon shorts and a long sleeved tech shirt. It felt GREAT!

7) I cannot even begin to explain the warm, fuzzy feeling that I get while watching Glee. I know, it's really ridiculous. I actually went and bought Season 1 on Sunday because Netflix couldn't send the discs to me fast enough!